You're the direction I follow to get home, when I feel like I can't go on, you tell me to go. And it's like I can't feel a thing without you around. And don't mind me if I get weak in the knees, cause you have that effect on me... You do.
Everything you say, every time we kiss I can't think straight, but I'm okay. And I can't think of anybody else who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you. So please give me your hand. So please give me a lesson on how to steal, steal the heart as fast as you stole mine. I can't think of anybody else who I hate to miss as much as I hate missing you..... <3
________________________________________
Ian:I have one more thing to say.
Me: What?
Ian: You're beautiful Nicole... Life needs time to happen and someone will come sweep you off your feet just don't look so hard... Make him come to you not the other way around.
Me: I'm going to continue to argue against that... Because I'll never agree.
Ian: This isn't finished but... You do realize I know you better than you think.
But Dear God do I wish it were him sweeping me off of my feet. I hate being so irrevocably in love with a person that doesn't feel the same. A person that is looking for love everywhere but right in front of him. A person who doesn't realize that there isn't possibly any other person in this world better for him than I. I'm so irrevocably in love that I've let go of everything else that's made me happy and hopelessly devoted my time to him. And now I'm left with nothing.
- Mood:
crappy - Music:6 Months by Hey Monday
....Just a little taste of the CRAZY weekend I had. These are pictures of my best friend Amalia (who just came home from Radford for T-Giving Break!!) and I who went to a party her sister hosted called a "Blackout Party," we all wore black and had an awesome time. More updates later. :)
- Mood:
contemplative - Music:Rock Me by Old Crow Medicine Show
- Mood:
chipper - Music:Hum Hallelujah by Fall Out Boy
Yeah he's a looker, but I really think it's guts that matter most. I displayed them for you, strewn out about from coast to coast.
- Mood:
angry - Music:Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap
Me: Can I drop out of college now and do what I want pleaseee?
You: Go for it .
Me: There are other things I'd rather be doing, but what I want can wait.
You: What do you want?
Me: I want to learn how to sail and get my own boat, and just live on it and go from port to port and take pictures of the world.
You: Interesting.
Me: Kindof.
You: Well, I think it is.
Me: Well I definetely think so too, but its just..out there. And probably not going to happen until after I grow old.
You: Well grow old faster.
a smile like yours in this world is difficult to find
don't second guess you spend every minute on my mind
because since i've met you my priorities are re aligned
with this new beginning i have no need to rewind
i can move on, leave those sad days behind
my once lonely heart has been reassigned
to a new pair of blue eyes so incredibly kind
- Music:Imogen Heap
I'll tell you flat out, it hurts so much to think of this. So, from my thoughts I will exclude the very thing that I hate more than everything is the way I'm powerless to dictate my own moods. I've thrown away so many things that could've been much more, and I just pray my problems go away if they're ignored. But that's not the way it works. When I go down, I go down hard. And I take everything I've learned and teach myself some disregard. When I go down, it hurts to hit the bottom. And of the things that got me there, I think, if only I had fought them. If and when I can clear myself of this clouded mind I'll watch myself settle down into a place where peace can search me out and find that I'm so ready to be found.
I've thrown away the hope I had in friendships. I've thrown away so many things that could have been much more. I've thrown away the secret to find an end to this. Any control I thought I had just slips right through my hands; while my ever-present conscience shakes its head and reprimands me. Then and there, I confess, I'll blame all this on my selfishness. Yet you love me, and that consumes me. And I'll stand up again, and do so willingly. You give me hope, and hope it gives me life. You touch my heavy heart, and when you do you make it light. As I exhale, I hear your voice. And I answer you, though I hardly make a noise. And from my lips the words I choose to say seem pathetic, but it's fallen man's praise. Because I love you. Oh God, I love you. And life is now worth living if only because of you. And when they say that I'm dead and gone, it won't be further from the truth.
When I go down, I lift my eyes to you. I won't look very far cause you'll be there with open arms to lift me up again.
- Mood:
hopeful
1. Every time I see the big dipper,
2. When I encounter a crashing wave,
3. When I eat chocolate ice cream,
4. When my car smells,
5. When my hair is curled,
6. Whenever I have to bleach my white shorts
7. When I hear "Crash Into Me," and 22594870 other songs because everything reminds me of you,
8. When I dance to G.Love or drive with my windows down to "Float On,"
9. Every day that your brother drives your truck past me with the VMI sticker on the back window,
10. When I think of where all my time went this summer,
11. When I drink mountain dew,
12. On the days that I take Seaside Road to get home,
13. When I sit on the dock at Tower Hill and just cry,
14. Whenever I hear someone say "Faggot Bitch,"
15. Everytime someone mentions the Marine Corps
16. When I'm in Biology and have nothing better to do,
17. When I smile and see the scar on my bottom lip,
18. When I'm drunk,
19. When I twist the ring on my finger, and
20. When I say or hear the words, "wonderful" or "ridiculous,"
21. Every time I look at my eyes and remember that they look just like yours...
sitting on railroad tracks watching the sunset with a camera in hand...i couldn't be any more relieved.
